What a week! Can it really already be Saturday night? This week has been full of excitement and powerful moments, many of which revolve around coaching. One reason I love reading our friends' Jamie and Mary's blog is because they are so thoughtful about the joys and challenges associated with coaching water polo. Clay and I can really relate to a lot of what they say. Coaching young people to love and do well in a particular sport can be a source of endless pleasure and frustration because at some point we have to let go, step back, and hope they can translate the hours of practice and dedication to actual performance. Mix in some tricky team dynamics, illnesses, mental blocks, and just plain bad luck, and you have a recipe for obsession.
Case in point: On Friday's practice, I was asked to take three girls on a 35 minute run before our race today. One of the girls immediately dropped back--frustrating for sure, she never feels she can keep up with the pack no matter how fast or slow we are going. Thus, I was running with two girls, and 25 minutes in, one of the girls heads home--too early. I signaled to her to keep going with us before finally turning back to see if she was okay. When I reached her, it was clear she was close to tears: "I can never go as fast as you all. You always push me too hard. You want this for me more than I want it."
Oh. No.
That last sentence is a coach's worst nightmare. There is simply nothing we can do when a player/athletic doesn't care about doing his best. You can coach talent and ability, but I've learned that it is very, very tough, perhaps impossible to coach heart. And when you have pushed a kid too hard, its similarly tough to pull them back in. Sure, we as coaches want to win badly, but I would venture to guess that the best coaches, at least at this level, want even more for their players to do their best. We want to see our athletes reach THEIR goals and exceed their own expectations, reaching some level of success along the way. We also want to have fun, get and stay fit, and enjoy a team dynamic that provides friendship, support, and encouragement. We as coaches don't get to play--but I have found in my 5 years of coaching that some of my favorite lifetime victories have been when I am on the sidelines, not on the field/court/race course. But when one of your athletes looks you with tears in her eyes in the middle of a workout and confesses she doesn't love it nearly as much as you love it or want it for her, you can't help but feel utterly defeated. You don't have to play to win or lose in the game of sports.
I still can't stop thinking about that girl, but it was refreshing to come home from that practice only to head back out to cheer on McC in our annual football rivalry against the Red Raiders. We joined thousands of fans dressed in blue (yay!) or red (boo!) at Finley Stadium last night. It was so exciting to see McC take control and keep it the entire game as they went on to win 24-3. The streak now stands at 11 games in a row. Clay knows all of the players, and so we knew how much time and effort--and heart--these boys had put into preparing for this game, so we couldn't have been more pumped for them that it paid off. Gotta love days when the two extremes of coacing--joys and frustrations, victory and defeat--are both displayed so prominently. It's just one of the many reasons we love teaching and coaching: we never stop learning.
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