Mama Time

Clay kicked me out of the house for two hours, sent me to the Teacher's College library with my computer and my book, and told me to HAVE FUN. Bless him. Because one thing I have learned this year is that I love to go go go with Will and work and projects until I just up and break down. It's like I run out of gas, out of GIVE, and I need to retreat for a few minutes to build myself back up again. 

So as I sit here in this lovely academic space for the first time all year, my mind is going crazy with so many thoughts that have little or nothing to do with Thomas the Tank Engine, what's for dinner (ahh I am out of ideas and only five years into my marriage--poor Clay), or the wonderful/neverending online courses I am teaching. And because I have time and because I am also realizing that writing=sanity for your little narrator, I thought I would take this precious opportunity to just write some more random thoughts.

1. Girls, at least this year, need girlfriends. I swear, next to the endlessly patient love of my husband and the amazing sweetness of my son, the girlfriends I have made this year have filled my days with laughter, friendship, and honesty in a way I could have never expected or even hoped for. I don't have many of them here, but I do have Maresa (Mac's mama), Lisa (a fellow recent transplant from VA whom I met at a random music lesson and on the spot we decided to become friends because neither of us had any others at that point), and Jennifer (fellow UVA-er who gracefully pursued my friendship and invited me into the mom's group that I TREASURE every Wednesday morning). What do I miss most about Chattanooga? My girlfriends. What will I miss most about NYC? Those three. 

2. Speaking of girlfriends, I have been working on a bit of a secret project for the past three months, and just this week did I hold the end result in my hands: 

It's a book! I have been editing and now publishing a collection of my GPS mentor's prayers, and it's finally done! You can find it here if you are interested in previewing it: Praying Life. This was a labor of love for me, and I feel so grateful the book actually got published before Jane retires in May.

3. Speaking of meals, I don't know whether it is our "kitchenette" or our tight food budget or simply my fatigue from being a full-time mom, but I am WORTHLESS when it comes to making yummy meals. Oh, I try, but the end result usually tastes as uninspired as I feel. It's funny, though: I love eating more than ever, and I thoroughly enjoy watching FoodNetwork and reading food blogs for fun. So, so weird.

4. Gifts. I have recently been asked by several friends for suggestions for gifts for new mamas, and it amazes me how quickly I forget what I loved receiving as a pregnant lady and as an over-the-moon but exhausted new mom. One of my best friends is also pregnant (so frickin' excited of her and for them and for this little one who is going to have two of the best parents ever), so I have been thinking a lot about gifts. More for my own future reference more than as advice for anyone,  I thought I would record some ideas:

Pregnant Mama presents: a pedicure, a cute maternity shirt (because mamas especially want and deserve to feel pretty as their bodies change), a sweet newborn outfit or blanket that they can hold to help them visualize their little one, an offer to go for a walk with them sometime (I couldn't get enough of walking in my later months and was so grateful for anyone who would join me), gift card for a date night out with the daddy-to-be. Those date nights will be hard to come by for a little while once the sweet little one is born.

New Mama Presents: Healthy homemade meal, netflix subscription (for all those late nights), lullaby music that doesn't drive parents crazy (I would recommend Jewel's baby CDs. I didn't love her adult work, but her original lullabies are gifts to parents as well as kiddos), go in with friends and provide a cleaning service for a couple of weeks--ah, what a luxury that would be!, favorite baby books parents would also enjoy reading over and over again, something with the baby's name on it (I treasure everything that has Will's name on it--they just feel extra special!), and socks! Baby can never have enough socks!!

But the main present would be time. I don't think exhausted new parents necessarily want to go out on the town right after the baby arrives, but a couple months later, being able to spend some focused time with your spouse knowing that your child is in loving, safe hands is the best present a mom could receive. I remember being so incredibly grateful to both of our parents for giving us date nights when they were in town. I felt badly going out when they were our guests, but I don't think Clay and I would have gone out otherwise. 

Young Moms: wine, meal ideas (see above), and toddler socks (I swear someone breaks into our apartment, takes one look around and decides nothing is worth stealing, and then for some reason takes Will's socks because we can't seem to hold onto socks if our life depended on it). Oh, and mama time in the Teacher's College library. Ahhhh.....

5. Clay and I watched The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo last night. Totally disturbed me. By no means have I ever liked hearing or watching scenes of sexual violence, but ever since becoming a mama, I. cannot. stomach. violence.

6. Reading for Cutting for Stone. Granted, I've only read the Prologue and I have 512 more pages to go before it's due back at the library next week, but man, that Prologue was really good.

7. Clay and I have discussed our hopes and dreams for our home come June or July. Clay wants a nice bathtub. I want a kitchen counter. Will wants "cheese." And Camden, bless his heart, yearns for grass. I think we can handle this wish-list.

8. I am thinking about giving up sodas. Not sure I can do it again. Any thoughts?

9. Will is so darn fun. He wakes up talking and laughing, he smiles all the time, he gives hugs and kisses freely, he loves riding on our shoulders, and he waves to everyone all the time. Yesterday, Will and I went down to meet our friend, Anna, at the Farmer's Market at Union Square and he was AMAZING on the subway there and back. Just amazing. We laughed and played the whole way back (a good 30 minute subway ride) and when I got up for our stop, a man came up to me and said, "You and your precious son just made my day. I love seeing families that happy together." Sigh. I will hold onto that man's comments forever.

10. I love my family. I really, really do. More than ever. It's been almost two hours alone and I am ready to be back with the ones I love. 

Love from us to you.

xoxo